In Love

A parent's love for their child(ren) is a strange and interesting thing. We go through 8-9 months of pregnancy, where we get sick, irritable, fat, and it ends in some of the most extreme pain possible. We get this tiny little wrinkled creature that squeaks and grunts and does horrible things to nipples and diapers. Then they grow up. They talk back and demand things and cost us more money than we even thought possible. Yet, we love them and continue to have more.



Every time I watch my 8 year old daughter on the monkey bars, or reading a book, or playing cars with her brother, I feel love. Every time my 3 year old son gives me a big hug and kiss, or lectures me on which car is which, or cheers me on as I transform one of his Transformers, I feel love. And every time my 6 day old daughter looks around in total wonder, or snuggles up peacefully for a nap, or opens wide and chomps down on my nipple, I feel love. Maybe it's the hormones, but when I see the 3 of my children together it brings a tear to my eye.





I love the way Samantha says she's magic because she can make the baby stop crying. I love the way Tevin has to know at every moment in time where the baby is. I love that this morning when I told Tevin that Samantha was coming home today from her weekend at Grandma & Grandpa's house, he was most happy because "now I can say sorry that I hit her in Wal-Mart yesterday." (he hit her while we were in the store Thursday and he feels really bad about it now.)



When I got pregnant, I never knew how much love a mother could feel. Then I had Samantha and knew that my life would never be the same. When I got pregnant with Tevin, I didn't know how I could possibly make more room in my heart for him. But he was a boy, and has a personality totally different from Samantha. It was so easy to have separate but equal love for them. And then Cadence. I already had my headstrong girl and my sweet, sensitive boy. I already felt like I didn't have quite enough time for both of them. How would a third baby fit in? And then I saw her for the first time and I was hooked.






She's just so sweet, and in a few short days I have learned so much about her. I love it when she looks around wide-eyed. When she flings herself into feeding position and starts sucking on everything she can get her mouth on. Even the way she goes from perfectly happy (or asleep) to screaming like the world is ending in just a few seconds. Babies are such amazing little miracles.

I was a bit worried about how she would change our lives. After nearly 4 years of being a family of 4, adding another just seemed like it would disrupt our balance. But it hasn't. She has enhanced our family and made us closer in so many ways. I love my family and my new baby girl.